So this week has been full of ‘unexpected’ happenings. It has amazed me how JOYful I’ve been in the midst. Like a child waiting for something. Recently, I’ve asked to taste and see the Lord’s hand and heart again in my days. When I pray, I think sometimes I have little faith. I mean, often I ask and hear ‘yes’ and I’m surprised. Other times, I BOLDLY ASK often for certain outcomes and clearly have a ‘no/not yet’ answer. As I asked this week, in these little bumps and have had a heart oriented to wait for how he’d move, I began to see Him with me. I don’t know that this is new, but it’s refreshing to not fall into exhaustion BEFORE I ask and watch.
I often get asked, “how are the boys doing with language?” I answer with an over the top “AMAZING”, because they just are. I follow it with, “they understand anything I ask them to do and I understand everything they’re telling me”. Today though, was a moment that made me realize, what I don’t know I don’t always realize. I need the Spirit to open my eyes, like the boys need their momma to help them learn and understand.
So we were driving back from an “unexpected” appointment for mom where they had to sit in the waiting room at a table, prepped with snack and books and a stern request not to get up. OK...the assistants were on it and willing to bring them in at a moments notice from them or their concern. So, said appointment takes longer than planned and we leave.
Now, the ‘longer than planned’ results in much dialogue for the ride home. So they say their ‘momma, why?’ or confirm with ‘momma, right?’ and I’m just wanting to get home or not justify everything. Then, I see our pastor’s van in front of us. We’re coming up to him and I divert the conversation with “Look, it’s Pastor Shelby” and give a little honk and wave. THEN IT HAPPENS. That moment when you laugh and cry. One of the boys laughs and SCREAMS:
IT’S GOD!!
Yes, you read it correctly: GOD. His brother chimes in with a ‘no, yes, no, yes’ and I’m laughing. Honk again, share the funny across rolled down windows (which out of context He probably didn’t even think was funny...but bad teaching). Still, this guy blesses me regularly, so I share. We go on about our carride.
I immediately go through all the corrections to his false statement, with things like
“you mean Pastor Shelby TEACHES US ABOUT GOD?”
“That was funny, can you see God?”
"you didn't really think that was God, did you?"
....
Then I asked, “Do you think he was JESUS?”
He said with the roaring laugh I had over his initial comment, “NO MOMMIE! He’s NOT Jesus! Jesus died. You can’t SEE Jesus. Jesus is in my heart. Mommy, Jesus is in your heart too, right?”
GULP. I said nothing else. He said it to me.
He didn’t ‘mess up’ thinking Pastor Shelby was God. He just hasn’t been given that connection yet. Jesus is who we talk about. We ask the Spirit to help us. And now I know I can somehow start talking about the Trinity with my 3-4 year olds. But you know what? At 6months home from an orphanage and learning about God through another language, he still could tell ME probably better than I will tell him. There is truth that I think too much about verses living.
Father, Son and Holy Spirit, THANK YOU that you are for my kids and for me. Thank you that you laughed today with us, but rejoice too over simple childlike faith. I don’t know that my son knows what “Jesus in his heart” really means, but I’m confident when God ordains the time for him to make that connection, he will.
And in the unexpected things and for eternity, if we don’t meet Jesus, we don’t get to meet the Father. Bring on your GLORY!
and some reminders that in spite of all the brokenness in our hearts and lives, there are glimpses of HIM in the midst:
“Who is a God like you, who pardons sin and forgives the transgression of the remnant of his inheritance? You do not stay angry forever but delight to show mercy.” Micah 7:18
I often get asked, “how are the boys doing with language?” I answer with an over the top “AMAZING”, because they just are. I follow it with, “they understand anything I ask them to do and I understand everything they’re telling me”. Today though, was a moment that made me realize, what I don’t know I don’t always realize. I need the Spirit to open my eyes, like the boys need their momma to help them learn and understand.
So we were driving back from an “unexpected” appointment for mom where they had to sit in the waiting room at a table, prepped with snack and books and a stern request not to get up. OK...the assistants were on it and willing to bring them in at a moments notice from them or their concern. So, said appointment takes longer than planned and we leave.
Now, the ‘longer than planned’ results in much dialogue for the ride home. So they say their ‘momma, why?’ or confirm with ‘momma, right?’ and I’m just wanting to get home or not justify everything. Then, I see our pastor’s van in front of us. We’re coming up to him and I divert the conversation with “Look, it’s Pastor Shelby” and give a little honk and wave. THEN IT HAPPENS. That moment when you laugh and cry. One of the boys laughs and SCREAMS:
IT’S GOD!!
Yes, you read it correctly: GOD. His brother chimes in with a ‘no, yes, no, yes’ and I’m laughing. Honk again, share the funny across rolled down windows (which out of context He probably didn’t even think was funny...but bad teaching). Still, this guy blesses me regularly, so I share. We go on about our carride.
I immediately go through all the corrections to his false statement, with things like
“you mean Pastor Shelby TEACHES US ABOUT GOD?”
“That was funny, can you see God?”
"you didn't really think that was God, did you?"
....
Then I asked, “Do you think he was JESUS?”
He said with the roaring laugh I had over his initial comment, “NO MOMMIE! He’s NOT Jesus! Jesus died. You can’t SEE Jesus. Jesus is in my heart. Mommy, Jesus is in your heart too, right?”
GULP. I said nothing else. He said it to me.
He didn’t ‘mess up’ thinking Pastor Shelby was God. He just hasn’t been given that connection yet. Jesus is who we talk about. We ask the Spirit to help us. And now I know I can somehow start talking about the Trinity with my 3-4 year olds. But you know what? At 6months home from an orphanage and learning about God through another language, he still could tell ME probably better than I will tell him. There is truth that I think too much about verses living.
Father, Son and Holy Spirit, THANK YOU that you are for my kids and for me. Thank you that you laughed today with us, but rejoice too over simple childlike faith. I don’t know that my son knows what “Jesus in his heart” really means, but I’m confident when God ordains the time for him to make that connection, he will.
And in the unexpected things and for eternity, if we don’t meet Jesus, we don’t get to meet the Father. Bring on your GLORY!
Rev 3:20 Here I am! I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in and eat with him, and he with me.
and some reminders that in spite of all the brokenness in our hearts and lives, there are glimpses of HIM in the midst:
“Who is a God like you, who pardons sin and forgives the transgression of the remnant of his inheritance? You do not stay angry forever but delight to show mercy.” Micah 7:18
