I kinda feel a little like Dorothy in the Wizard of Oz this week. I know. crazy. I don’t know, just this sense of ‘no clue’ in what’s ahead is like closing your eyes, clicking those fancy shoes and being in a strange but wonderful land with new people, friends and experiences. The part I find I’m most like is I want to have all the ‘great memories’ behind me and be back in my bed waking up safe and sound in Richmond with those I love. I really feel loved. Our parents, our friends, our church family...I feel as close to ready for “something” as ever. Most of all, I feel loved by my God.
I also feel like it’s time to get this show on the road. I mean we’ve been walking this road a while and now folks are even saying it’s time for those boys to be home. That warms my heart on the one hand and frightens me on the other. I mean it frightens me b/c I wonder if I’ve gone on and on and involved folks too much when ‘nothing’ was there. Are they tired of hearing about ‘our journey’? It’s not even ending with this trip. Today it hit me. They’re not tired. Not any more tired than I am. They’re excited. Excited for the things God is doing. Excited for a taste of what’s to come with us. Thrilled that we’d be bold enough and they GET to pray for us. We’ve reaped the benefits of others' prayers and love for us in ways that I wouldn’t trade.
I’ll admit I’m on a high that makes me think the ‘bomb is going to drop’ soon. That’s what adoption does. It just doesn’t make sense. We can’t control or make it happen. We can’t control God’s adoption of us as His children and we can’t control this adoption of our boys. The bomb might drop, but God doesn’t drop his children. WE’RE IN HIS GRIP...forever!
So as I’m tempted to believe things are ‘too good’, I’ll choose to also believe God’s love is even better. The ‘too good’ does give me a taste. But it’s truly just a taste. I’m grateful for this journey and seeing how real God is to us. I’m grateful for a taste. You see, when the taste isn’t there, it produces a hunger. The hunger ‘needs satisfying’. If you’ve tasted, you know it can be satisfied. I’m grateful for the tasting.
I can tell you right now, the ‘hunger’ I’ll feel when we leave those boys at the orphanage will not be one of ‘feeling satisfied’. Ironically, the hunger will drive me to search, wait and ask for FILLING that I can’t get anywhere else but with the Lord. THANK YOU FRIENDS FOR CARRYING US TO JESUS!!! Truly that is friendship that satisfies.
oh...and found out that the all the paperwork is NOT there for our court appt. ugh. still time. We still go. That’s all we can do...AND ASK! Our boys wait for a family. We wait for them. "THERE'S NO PLACE LIKE HOME"!
I hope to see this as a place to remind myself (and hopefully others) of the heart and hand of Jesus. If we can't see those, then truly life is lived with a dim view of what is real and what is to come. I hope you too will "process" what is going on in your heart and life. I know I need reminders of JOY in my full days. Hence the blog: JOY in the JOURNEY. It's there friends...may we have eyes to see it and hearts to grasp how good HE is!
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