Went shopping...

So we’ve been picking up a few things here and there to take with us on our trip and to the orphanage.  Tonight though, WE WENT SHOPPING...FOR THE KIDS! It was funny, I didn’t even flinch at the ‘total’.  I don’t even feel done.  Why? I’m still processing.  I think a piece of it is OUR BOYS will be playing and growing from what we bring.  Still, why do I need a ‘connection’ to care?  Why does it matter if ‘our boys’ touch these toys and activities? That’s my flesh...justify it, make sense, connect personally.  Thankfully, my God knows me enough to connect the dots for me.  Then He shows me.  See? All along...children,innocent children; without families, without folks coming to to them...all around.  Children who are orphaned, alone and unsettled.  My heart is stirred, again.

These orphans can’t help their plight.  They can’t know what they’re ‘missing’.  Then I think, will our boys be more ‘unfocused’ because they’ve never had a chance to focus on ‘toys and games’? Will they ever adjust to what America offers? Will they ever remember what life was like in Ethiopia?  The answer to these questions don’t really matter do they?  They don’t matter because they’re the WRONG QUESTIONS!  The only thing that matters that they’re missing in their life in mine is the hand of Jesus.  It’s all settled when that’s there.  But every single day I function (in fact over function) as if there are soooo many things to add to that settlement. 

You see, I hope and pray that God is at work through our adoption of our boys, The J Crew;)  That’s in HIS hands though.  What has been shown to me over and over is how much I need reminding of this ‘exchange’ that has already taken place for ME...and all the Schwarzes.  Why is it, that I really think there’s something else?  I mean, if there was, then why would I be ‘risking’ taking my kids clear across the world to Ethiopia?  I wouldn’t.  I’d play it safe.  I’d hibernate in my bubble of comfort, of acquiring, of having and of enjoying.  I’d never say ‘dare’.  But guess what? I say ‘dare’! I dare my own heart to trust...to trust that God has things for us as we step our of our comfort and into His calling.  Don’t think for a minute it’s been ‘easy’.  I’ve realized that when God says, ‘follow’, there’s not guarantees where we’re going.  That’s where the ‘Jakob’ wrestling comes in.  That’s where the holding onto of ‘promises’ that “Jeremiah” knew I cling to.  That’s why TO Jeremiah and Jakob, we come.  Not just because of adoption, but because of our Father...your Father, and our inheritance.  There’s nothing greater than a God who doesn’t get tired of clingy children. 

So, we went shopping, we bought lots of ‘stuff’, and we cling.  We cling not to what we bring, but to who brings us.  It’s a wild and fun ride that has its moments of fear but more moments of JOY and HOPE.  Thank you Jeremiah and Jakob for being a part of our story!! WE’RE COMING SOON!!!