IT WAS MORE THAN AWESOME TO BE BACK WITH OUR OTHER KIDDOS!!! For now, we're spending some time learning to be a family of 7. It's up and down and all around, but here are some things I’m processing:
*Our trip home was exhausting but so blessed in spite of the ‘circumstances’. The flight was delayed, full and our tvs were out. Now, the boys don’t like TV but they would have liked pushing the screen/buttons for entertainment. To top it off, once they finally went to sleep they made us sit them up and buckle them for our refuel in Rome. C’mon folks...if we’re going down, then some sleeping toddlers won’t know the difference! By this point it’s 4am and I’m thinking...do YOU want to come sit in my seat? do YOU want to busy them for the next 12 hour leg? do YOU !@#$...yes, my heart was grumbly! BUT...the boys rallied and were happy and i got in a few zzzzs while daddy took over (20 whole solid minutes!). We managed. Remember those late night conversations I said I thought would be better than sleep...well they didn’t fail to disappoint. A lady from Zambia and I had such a fabulous time sharing, listening and pointing each other to God’s hand in each other’s lives. Where did that come from? All in the midst of toddlers and new experiences and naps. I love how sufficient God is!!!
*Our family is soooo different!!! I can’t even put into words or even really begin processing yet. Keep praying. I’m sooo grateful for Andy being home and for the ‘no agenda’ life for now. It eats at me already at times, but I’m reminded of the short-term treat it is.
*The boys are picking up FAST!! I can not believe we haven’t even been home but 4 days!!! From initial revolting of American foods to much ‘mommy look, daddy look’ at their trying of new things...we REJOICE! I expected them to be so fearful for some reason of new experiences, but they eat them up!!! The pool, friends, fireworks, church...it’s all gone pretty well. We see the differences in them (i.e. When they’re quiet) but it doesn’t seem to send them. They jabber with each other and seem to be excited. Sometimes too excited to sleep now!! I love hearing them speak in their native language back and forth for 30+ minutes at nap and bedtime. It delights my soul that God gave them each other to process when we can’t help them do that. So, I pop my head in and say ‘Jesus loves you boys!!!’ and they say “Jesus loves you boys!”. Repetition...it’s how we learn;)
*Our other kiddos are communicating the ‘impact effects’ more. It’s good to discuss. Pray for us as we work through and point each other to why, how and WHO!!
*I miss Africa. Not knowing when we’ll be back is hard. I long for a piece of that simplicity and the contentedness of the people in my days. I wouldn’t trade America for it but God is near the folks there...and we saw it!
*My heart is aching often. I can’t reach for my camera fast enough for all the ‘firsts’. In their 3 and 4 years of life, they haven’t experienced as much as they have in these few days!
Some firsts: plane ride, family with older siblings, mom and dad, our home, CARSEATS (THEY HATE 'EM), Target, pool, church, friends, the dog (they hate the dog), sippy cups, ice cream, popsicles, tv, BEDS vs cribs, whispering, CHOICES, fun toys, stroller walks, squirrels, cats, fireworks, pool, lots of different food, ENGLISH vs Amharic...and the list grows...
I just constantly see the Lord’s hand in how they’re moving through their new life. How can that be? I know a day will come (and many moments have) that puts them under the table and frustrated. But for the most part, they’re rolling and it’s good. I’m most discouraged by not having the ‘conversations’ I remember having with the other kids at their age. I know they’d like it too. We can’t even read anything...just look at picture books. I know...be patient, it’ll come. I BELIEVE THAT. Still, in the moments, you see what we take for granted every single day. I want to match that gap with something ...like the boys’ getting on board. In reality, I really don’t want the gap to be filled. I want to continue in the expectancy, hope and JOY I see in our boys’ faces.
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There’s more...always more. It’s when I expect to be surprised and delighted by Jesus that I’m most satisfied. Motherhood of these boys does me well...it reveals my hardened heart and points me to the JOY I long for...joy that won’t stop when it’s waiting on the Lord!
Thank you Jesus that you still surprise us..delight us...and delight IN US!! Teach me to long for more of YOU!!
That’s all for now...there are soo many things I could say but GRATEFUL FOR YOUR PRAYERS AND ENCOURAGEMENT!! God’s heart is near:)
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